When people share their fears with you about coronavirus, what do you say?
When you share your worries, what do you hear?
For those who are hurting, the usual “let’s keep it positive” perspectives might not fill the bill. Overly positive, cheerleader behavior can miss the boat on empathy and make you feel as though your pain is being minimized or ignored.
Here’s a concept: we are not bad people for having “negative” thoughts or emotions.
We are human.
Being human means we experience “negative” thoughts and emotions as well as “positive” ones. I have noticed lately that there is some shame around admitting many legitimate fears around the pandemic. We might even feel guilty that the disruptions or trauma we have experienced is comparatively small given the bigger picture, when we’re confronted with so much suffering on a global level.
The fact is, COVID has caused a variety of rough disruptions in all of our lives. Being told to “be positive,” “think positive,” or “you got this,” can shut down a conversation and gloss over real, legitimate feelings. It leads to an inability to be honest and vulnerable about what we’re going through.
An empathetic response reassures the other person that you’re seeing the situation from their side, and sharing in their suffering.
Mastering your inner world, so that you can use all of your emotions and experiences as fuel for your life, is where coaching comes in. As your coach, I can help you find the resilience you need to weather these trying times.
As a Life Coach, That’s Where I Come In:
Your Coach, Your Advocate
Working with me, Life Coach Catharine Ecton, gives you the opportunity to vent honestly, in a way you may not be able to do with friends and family members.
In a healthy friendship, there is a give-and-take of news, feelings, events, and relationships. How has the pandemic changed your discussions? How open are you to revealing your ups and downs as you cope with a new reality? Do politics creep into your conversations, and then make you pull back from fully expressing yourself?
As a Life Coach, my primary role is to be my clients’ advocate. I listen and validate their feelings, especially now when many of us are getting so good at covering them up. With me, my clients are confident that they have a platform where they can explore a range of emotions. There is a bond of trust where one can “unmask” and express themselves freely. Once that level of honesty is established, I have been told almost without fail that my clients find immense relief in our life coaching sessions. That draining and tiring knee-jerk response, that “everything is okay,” or “I can handle it,” is replaced by an honest look at the current hardships, and exploration of a new plan.
This honest look at the situation inevitably unlocks creativity and a fresh perspective, one that wasn’t available before.
It may be time to face letting go of some old dreams. The great news is, that can mean realizing some new goals that may have previously seemed out of reach. All of this is done with an end goal of becoming more of who you were always meant to be, living the life you’ve always wanted to live. The coaching work we do will help you build confidence in recognizing this true self.
It’s no secret: 2020 is testing our resolve and resilience. Let’s talk about how you feel today, no holding back. Then you can move ahead and adjust your plans.
Need an ally in this work? I believe we can change our lives one day at a time. We’re not broken, and we don’t need fixing. We have everything within ourselves to create the life we’ve always dreamed of. With the right tools, a few powerful questions, and the courage to create something great despite life’s chaos, we can get to where we want to be. We don’t even have to know what “our best life” looks like, just that we want to live it.